Monday, December 28, 2009

Safety first.

Article I, Section 8 of the Constitution of the United States lists many of the duties of the federal government. Among them is the requirement for protecting and defending the nation. This latest little fiasco in Detroit featuring flight 253 reveals that the feds are failing miserably in the fulfillment of their assigned Constitutional duties. While aggressively seeking to expand the reach and power of the federal government, they come up short in doing what they have been mandated to do. With the passage of the ill conceived and misnamed “Patriot Act,” Congress and the previous administration broadly and intrusively increased federal interference into our personal lives and liberty.


Remember back to the halcyon days when the Patriot Act was being promoted, and one of the critical provisions was the nationalization of the airport security apparatus. Formerly, each airline provided its own gate side security force, but Big Nanny desired to take this woefully inadequate gaggle and transform it overnight into a civil service protected inadequate gaggle. I’ve done quite a bit of air travel over the years, and I suspect that many of those TSA security “professionals” couldn’t qualify as a greeter at my local Wal-Mart.

So we have this Nigerian, Abdulmutallab, flying one way—Amsterdam to Detroit—RED FLAG. He pays cash for his $2800.00 fare. RED FLAG. He has no luggage to stow. RED FLAG. He had no valid passport. RED FLAG. He was on the “terror watch list.” SUPER, DUPER, RED FLAG. His father had reported his concern about his son’s activities some weeks earlier. TRIPLE DECKER RED FLAG. He carried incendiary material in his underwear. EXPLOSIVELY SCARY RED FLAG. Who is watching the security gate? Mr. Magoo and Stevie Wonder? How’s that Patriot Act working out for you, huh? This entire FUBAR would alarm me, but my concern has been heightened by the fact that my wife had traveled on that same flight several days earlier. She had been to Dubai on a business trip and had changed planes in Amsterdam for her last leg home.

Fortunately, an alert and resourceful Dutch engineer subdued the Nigerian nihilist. Plus, he must have pee’d on his fuse in the restroom because it failed to ignite properly. If either of those factors had not occurred, we would be discussing more than 280 dead on the plane and who knows how many on the ground. What was the initial response from Homeland Security Secretary Janet Napolitano? “The system worked.” She later backtracked and admitted there were some flaws in security procedures. You can’t get anything past her: she’s way too smart. She’s so smart that I wish she would explain to me how the civil-service protected goobers at our gates are protecting and defending us.

The HS-TSA bifecta has already implemented some radical new measures to ensure event-free flights. For the last hour of a given flight, passengers will not be allowed to visit the restroom or to have anything on their laps. Travelers will be required to sit in the upright position with their hands placed on their laps. I bet that’ll work. Bennie the bomber has already begun to circumvent the rule makers’ latest inane restrictions. It hasn’t yet been mentioned, but given that Abdulmutallab stowed the explosive in his “Fruit of the Looms,” each of us will have to endure an undergarment check. You mother was right. Always wear clean underwear…skid marks could be mistaken for an explosive substance. Get used to the idea that you may hear the following as you check in at the airport: “O.K., drop your drawers, bend over and grab your ankles.” Of course, Big Government has been telling us that for years. Nothing new there.

As always, your comments are welcomed or email:  cnpearl@woh.rr.com

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